“If you can’t afford to tip, don’t buy a drink.”


Makes sense to me and I’ve never bartended (in public) in my life.

The New Yorker‘s Sasha Frere-Jones discusses bartending, tipping and rock shows in ‘The Point of Tipping’. Here’s the starting point:

My friend Amy Korb tends bar at the Bowery Ballroom. On Saturday, she was working at the smallest of the venue’s three bars—the one against the back wall on the main floor, facing the stage. She wore a black half-length sweater, for comfort and warmth; there was a draft from a nearby exit. Over the noise, she mimed her reaction to the evening’s bands (a shrug, no smile).

A muscular woman and her older date bought several mixed drinks. A twenty-something bought several Heinekens. Each left exactly one dollar bill as a tip. Several others came and went, taking their drinks and leaving nothing. Korb sat on top of a freezer with her legs folded, ate part of a Clif Bar, and frowned.

“If you can’t afford to tip, don’t buy a drink,” she said to me, and to no one. She elaborated: “In a music venue, like-minded people get together. They like the same music, they like the same liquor. They also seem to have been socialized together, and they usually tip the same.”

The Heineken youngster came back for more drinks. And left without tipping.

“Whenever the night starts out with people asking for Long Island Iced Teas, you are in trouble. Vodka, gin, tequila, rum, Triple Sec, sour mix and Coca-Cola blended together in one drink? Fortunately, we don’t serve those at the Bowery. It’s house policy, and it helps weed the population.”

People still willfully drink Long Island Ice Teas? Ugh!

Why don’t people give a $5 or $10 tip at the beginning of the night so the bartender doesn’t end up spitting in their drinks for the rest of the night? (Disclaimer: I’m sure Ms. Korb doesn’t do that.) Please read the rest of the post for what live shows attract people who embrace tipping as a part of nightlife and not a rash.

What happened on In Treatment in the Jake and Amy session?


I am a voyeur when it comes to fictional couple  issues for a variety of reasons.

One, it’s a convenient method for avoiding my own couple issue.  Two, I can pretend that my nosiness about other people’s idiosyncrasies and flaws is somehow helping me with my myriad of issues.  Three, since I can’t afford therapy this is the best I can do.

So does anyone know what happened to make Amy cry like she was in a church on  Sunday morning on the last episode?

New York, are you gonna take this kind of diss from Madame Madonna?


“It’s not the exciting place it used to be. It still has great energy; I still put my finger in the socket. But it doesn’t feel alive, cracking with that synergy between the art world and music world and fashion world that was happening in the 80s. A lot of people died.”

Damn, Madonna.  What can Tallulah do to make you love our drab, dull azzes again?

I hope Wendy Williams isn’t getting her butt beat by her husband.


DJ’s Hubby Beat Her: Aide (NY Post)

Lovers, spouses beating up on their loved ones confuses me. What misfired neuron makes someone think it’s okay to beat up on someone they love?

The stats are frightening:

According to a 2000 Department of Justice study, 1.3 million women and 835,000 men in the United States are physically assaulted annually by an intimate partner. Also, 1,247 women, which is 33 percent of all female murders, and 440 men, 4 percent of all male murders, are killed by an intimate partner.


I hope Wendy is right and the aide is lying because the idea that someone as successful as her accepting an ass whipping as her due is unsettling.

Again, the rules are different for women.


A blind item from Panache Report:

You don’t have to be a sports fan to know who this NBA star is. The open marriage he shares with his wife is slowly leaking out. She found out about his numerous outside kids as well as his jump-off and wifey.

She threatened to take him to the cleaners unless he agreed to an open marriage. She got involved with another NBA player. Rumor has it, our star had him traded.

They recently attended a very affluent and discreet swingers event for celebrities. He participated in a group orgy but became enraged when his wife engaged in sex with a celebrity at the party. He grabbed her and made a scene, telling her, “you are the mother of my kids, I dare you!” despite the fact he participated in an orgy. When she brought this up, he said, “men have different needs than women, accept it.”

According to our source, after she dressed, he roughly grabbed her by the arm and they exited the party.

But, but, but he brought his wife to the party!!!!!

If he didn’t want her there, why didn’t he tell her he was going out for an In N Out burger with his teammates?

Or bring his jump-off?

This picks up on the double standard that several men have when it comes to sex and infidelity. Translation: I can f**k whoever I want, when I want and how I want. You are the mother of my kids and have to adhere to a standard I dictate which means only my penis gets to be in your various holes.

It doesn’t matter if a man’s net worth is $1 or $100 million, he can justify this belief because it’s important that the mother of his children is a wholesome creature that could never ever desire another man. (I’m giggling at this, too.)

Why are men, STILL, embracing the impossible archetypes (madonna, whore, jumpoff, mommy) for women to aspire or stoop to? (Paging Eliot Spitzer.) It’s as if their upstairs and downstairs brains refuse to accept that a woman’s sexuality isn’t wrapped up in her ability to keep the human race going. And that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.

I wish that NBA star (and other men who think like him) would give all the women in his life the space to explore their sexuality to the fullest without imposing his warped psychosexual hangups.

Did they or didn’t they?


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Star reported last night that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie got married. The story was picked up by the world. And then People.com weighed in, as the matronly grandmother of gossip mags, with the sobering quote from the ever reliable ‘source close to the couple’ that nope, no wedding.

Who is the source?  Is it Cindy Guagenti, Pitt’s publicist? Maybe Jon Voight, Angelina’s father?  Or maybe it’s The Secret Council of American Negros ‘Littlest’ Agent?

It’s not that deep who the source is but I’m curious why People thinks that would be good enough to debunk a competitor’s major scoop (if it turns out to be true.)



Why do I have to wait until 2009 for David Alan Grier’s Chocolate News?


Comedy Central has announced that David Alan Grier will be the executive producer of David Alan Grier’s Chocolate News, a fake magazine show that
makes no apologies for its biased approach as it investigates inherently urban pop culture topics such as an operation to save black and white conjoined twins, steroid use in Little Leaguers and a rapper’s public service announcement gone awry. The point-of-view is decidedly from an African American perspective and everyone and everything is fair game for Grier and his regular team of investigators.


Here are some other topics for the show to consider: